NEWS FLASH: George W. Bush is a Booger Picker.
After an exhaustive search, I have uncovered incontrovertible documentary evidence that George W. Bush is a booger picker. There is no date associated with this footage, but judging by the imagery, I would estimate this evidence to date back to before he became President. What I want to know is this-- why weren't the American people told about this? I for one am appalled at the thought of the President of the United States casually picking his nose and flicking boogers at other heads of state. Worse yet, what if he smears them on the Oval Office desk? What's going to be the cost to taxpayers of chiseling off those hard crusty boogers once he leaves office? It's a scandal!
Now, there is no hard evidence that Bush has flicked boogers on either Tony Blair or Kofi Annan. That doesn't mean he hasn't done it, however. Nor am I aware of any evidence that White House furniture is now encrusted with dried nasal mucous. You can't be too careful with these things, however. It would be highly embarrassing if someone like Vladimir Putin were to discover that he had a booger stuck to his pants after leaving the White House. Remember, just because we don't know that Bush is an inveterate booger flicker doesn't mean that he's not.
If, like me, you think it's about time the White House owned up to this crime against humanity, then do something about it. Go to the actionCenter and write to your local newspaper demanding answers!
Posted by Jason at August 28, 2003 08:18 AM